Four Agreements for Life

Julie Farha

Julie Farha

Have you read The Four Agreements by Don Miguel Ruiz? If not, I highly recommend it. It is an easy read and the wisdom is simple and practical. I’ll summarize below and add a few of my interpretations as well as the authors:

1. Be Impeccable With Your Word

           Speak the truth, say only what you mean. Don’t embellish or exaggerate. Follow through with what you say you will do. Speak with integrity which means be fully present in the moment and speak your truth in that moment. Watch your vernacular with phrases like “this is killing me!” Don’t gossip or speak ill of others or yourself. Use positive words or stay silent. Sometimes silence is better than the words you may choose.

2. Don’t Take Anything Personally

           More often than not, how someone else behaves in any given moment is more about them than you. We are all on our own journey, dealing with the stuff of life which can be a motive for how we react and how we treat others. When someone is hurtful for example, it likely isn’t because you are bad, wrong, not good enough etc. It is because of an aspect within themselves. By not taking things personally, you lessen the drama in your life, you are more open to understanding another’s behavior which leads to more understanding and compassion, and eventually forgiveness. Taking things personally also perpetuates martyr mentality.

3. Don’t Make Assumptions 

           Assumptions can lead to confusion, hurt feelings, drama, stress, and anxiety. It can negatively impact your relationships. When you make assumptions, you jump to wrong conclusions. If you act on these conclusions that causes a whole host of other problems. Don’t assume, ask. Information is energy in motion. Making assumptions is due to a lack of information. So find out. Ask. When you do, the energy takes form, the focus becomes clear and then you will know what is what and can act appropriately.

4. Always Do Your Best

           This speaks for itself. Even if your best doesn’t hit the mark, do it anyway. You will feel a sense of accomplishment and pride. Genius is the willingness to be wrong in the pursuit of what is right.  Always doing your best no matter what is an aspect of genius. Don’t get hung up on whether or not your best is good enough. It is about exploring your genius and the intricate nuances of life. Think of a time where you didn’t do your best. How did that make you feel? Pretty icky, right?

Do these resonate? Which one(s) stand out? For me, number 2 has been my biggest challenge. It is easier as time goes on but it is still something that needs a regular reminder. The Four Agreements is a blueprint on how to live with integrity, honor and respect to yourself and others.  timeless and succinct yet oh, so effective. I’d love to know what you think!

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